


In the Morning I'll be Better

by orangeintheovercast



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Bull is there in the background, Cole tries to help, Dorian needs a hug, Griffin being emotionally constipated, M/M, Trespasser, Trespasser DLC, and so does Griffin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-17 21:17:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9345596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orangeintheovercast/pseuds/orangeintheovercast
Summary: “Leliana told us about your little pyrotechnics display during your last chat.” His voice sounded foreign in his ears. It was too meek – too vulnerable to belong to him. “Why didn’t you say something? I could’ve…” What? What help could you have possibly been, Pavus? “I don’t know, something.”His words lingered in the space between them, carried on Griffin’s footsteps and nothing else. Dorian waited, praying that Griffin would pause, turn around, give him anything to prove he wasn’t already gone for good.The moment when Dorian thought he would lose his Inquisitor forever.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Another gift fic for [earthprincewu](http://earthprincewu.tumblr.com) because his Inquisitor is wonderful and I have a thirst for angst. Set toward the end of Trespasser, right before the final confrontation with Viddasala. At this point, Griffin and Dorian are sort-of together, but they haven't had much chance to talk about it yet. Cue suffering.

He was dying.

He would never admit it, but Dorian could read between the lines of Griffin’s stony silences. Dorian knew that the anchor was out of control – he’d had his suspicions since this whole mess with the Qunari began. He’d never found the nerve to actually bring it up with Griffin, not when they already had so many problems to worry about. Griffin hated exposing his weaknesses to other people. Everyone else always had to be taken care of first. That was why it was Dorian’s job to take care of him, to make sure he never neglected himself.

And he’d failed this time. Griffin was dying, and Dorian hadn’t even tried to stop it.

Now he didn’t know what to do. They were marching straight into what was likely a suicide mission, fighting once again to save the bloody world, and Dorian _didn’t know what to do._ His heart weighed like a stone in his chest, his mind was a frenzy of fear and grief and helplessness, and Griffin had hardly even looked at him since they’d left the Winter Palace. He’d hardly looked at any of them. Cole and Bull seemed just as lost as Dorian felt, flanking him on either side like ghosts as they followed Griffin through Eluvian after Eluvian.

Griffin had always had walls built up around himself. But he’d never kept Dorian out like this before.

An eternity of traversing floating cliffs and loose walkways passed before Dorian couldn’t handle it anymore. The tension was too thick, squeezing in on him and crushing the air from his lungs. If he had to spend another second just staring at the back of Griffin’s head, his whole body was going to collapse.

“Leliana told us about your little pyrotechnics display during your last chat.” His voice sounded foreign in his ears. It was too meek – too _vulnerable_ to belong to him. “Why didn’t you say something? I could’ve…” _What? What help could you have possibly been, Pavus?_ “I don’t know, something.”

His words lingered in the space between them, carried on Griffin’s footsteps and nothing else. Dorian waited, praying that Griffin would pause, turn around, give him _anything_ to prove he wasn’t already gone for good.

When Griffin finally responded, his voice was almost inaudible. “It doesn’t matter now. We need to stay focused.”

“Doesn’t _matter_?” Disbelief colored Dorian’s tone. Somehow it sounded even weaker than before. “Oh, well, pardon me for assuming your _life_ mattered, Griffin. My mistake.”

Griffin’s hands clenched at his sides. Dorian’s eyes darted to his left one, where errant green sparks were escaping from under his glove. The sight made Dorian’s stomach churn.

“You can’t just ignore this. We’ve been ignoring it for too long already.” Dorian swallowed hard, willing himself to keep talking. It was the only way to drown out his spiraling thoughts. “I won’t let you waltz right into your own death.”

The sparks climbed higher up Griffin’s arm, snaking around his wrist. His shoulders were rigid, but he kept walking, still refusing to look back at his companions.

Gritting his teeth, Dorian quickened his pace until he was close enough to snag Griffin’s bicep, yanking him to a stop. “ _Venhedis_ , Griffin, _talk to me._ Shutting me out now isn’t going to solve anything. In fact, here’s a thought, maybe this whole catastrophe would be a little less painful for everyone if you’d just _let us help you._ We still need you, you know. _I_ still need you. I’m not –”

“Dorian.”

It was barely more than a murmur, but it stung as if Griffin had struck him, knocking loose what little breath there was in Dorian’s lungs. His name was cracked and strained on Griffin’s tongue, glimpses of grief slipping through Griffin’s careful composure. He half-turned toward Dorian, the hurt in his eyes at war with his cool expression. “Don’t. Please.”

Dorian’s fingers went slack on Griffin’s arm, and he shrugged them off, setting his jaw and continuing on his way. The skin of Dorian’s hand burned even as the rest of his body turned to ice, numbing his nerves and freezing his feet to the ground. He wanted to scream, tear his hair out, throw himself to his knees and beg Griffin to stay with him, _Maker_ , just fuck it all and let the world rot this time. They didn’t deserve him. His life was worth more than this – it was worth _everything_.

Soft shuffling alerted Dorian to Cole’s approach, his small figure stopping in Dorian’s peripheral vision. His gaze was trained on the same place Dorian’s was – Griffin’s retreating back. “He’s scared. It’s too fragile, too bright and green and _painful_. Holding it all in his hands, all he wanted, and then having it ripped away. Lost and loved and lost again.” Cole sighed, his voice dropping even lower, shaking with emotion. “He doesn’t want to die. He thinks he has to.”

A lump formed in Dorian’s throat, his sight blurring around the edges. He swallowed hard, willing himself to hold it together, even if each step Griffin took was another piece of his world falling apart. _I knew you would break my heart, you bloody bastard._

**Author's Note:**

> Be sure to visit [earthprincewu](http://earthprincewu.tumblr.com)'s tumblr to see more stuff about Griffin! Thanks for reading!


End file.
